For many people, dating is a challenging thing to do, even without an STD such as herpes. Genital herpes makes it even harder. Many people with this STD stay away from dating because they fear failure, embarrassment, or being rejected often. Even with no experience in dating with an STD, people tend to form their assumptions that make it even harder for them to enjoy dating once again.
The thing is that it doesn’t necessarily have to be this way. There are things that you can do and learn to make dating exciting once again. In our efforts to help you overcome this challenge, we have compiled a list of 7 facts that make dating with herpes easier.
Every Sixt Person Has It
You are not all alone in the world with herpes. We know that you might feel that way once you learn your diagnosis. The most important thing to know is that every sixth person has genital herpes. We are not trying to tell you that you should start feeling better because there are so many people with genital herpes.
What you can learn from this is that people are aware of this STD. With so many infected out there the chances are that everyone knows at least one person in their social circles who has it. You are not alone in it, and it shouldn’t discourage you from dating again.
Judgment is Very Common
You are not the first nor the last person who has been judged by others for getting infected with genital herpes. Most likely, you will experience this judgment being cast on you. It’s important to give your best not to identify yourself with your disease. You are not it.
If you experience any problems with this, we suggest that you seek professional counsel. It will help you work on your issues, sort things out, and regain the courage to face the real world and all that comes with it. More importantly, you will become more aware of your predicament, acknowledge your delicate situation, and regain self-confidence.
Finding a Date is Easy
One more thing that can possibly be on your mind is “I won’t be able to find a date, ever.” It is completely understandable to be in this mood. Dealing with a genital herpes diagnosis can be very hard, let alone think about dating now that you are infected. But don’t forget that we live in 2018 and that the world is so much more forgiving today than it was just a few decades ago.
People have managed to remove the stigma related to being infected with STD. Today there are dating websites specifically developed for people who are infected with STDs, including the ones with genital herpes. Upon registration on one of these websites, you will be able to find, chat with and date other people with STDs.
Finding a Date is Convenient
We live in the era of smartphones. To help people with STDs feel normal and experience dating, as usual, some companies have developed dating apps for mobile devices. If you feel estranged and alone, these apps can help you establish communication with other people who are infected with STDs and are interested in dating.
This can significantly improve your quality of life and help you regain self-confidence. You will be able to chat with your date candidates on the go, for example, while commuting or on a launch break. Finding a date has never been more convenient than it is today. It might be useful for you to know that these herpes dating sites are available for both iOS and Android phones.
PositiveSingles is such an app. Their mobile app is a nice extension to their dating website that specializes in bringing together people with STDs. They have more than 10,000 daily active users and over 100,000 daily conversations.
The Best Time To Disclose your Diagnosis
One of the most common questions asked by people who have genital herpes is “When is the best time to disclose my diagnosis to my date?” If you decide to give online dating a go, you will have to disclose your diagnosis while you are registering your account.
While, at the start, this might appear way too intrusive, soon you’ll figure out that everyone on the platform had to do it. And that people still want to talk to you and go out on a date with you, even if they know that you have genital herpes.
If you decide to go “old school” dating, there are some general guidelines to follow when it comes to the most appropriate time to disclose your diagnosis to your date. For instance, you shouldn’t tell your date that you have an STD right on the first date.
Before you come out, wait for until there’s at least some connection between the two of you. But don’t wait for too long, as it’s important to disclose this information before you two have sex.
You Can Reduce The Risk To Spread Herpes
There are many people with genital herpes without any interest in dating because they think that they can spread herpes to others. We have to be honest here and say that this is a very legitimate concern. Being aware of this fact can help you become more responsible, but it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t enjoy the pleasures of sex ever again.
If you have been diagnosed with genital herpes, you are probably on some sort of therapy. You should talk with your doctor to make sure that you are receiving suppressive therapy. This is therapy significantly lowers the risk of herpes transmission. In combination with condoms, even during oral sex, suppressive therapy gives the best results and reduces the transmission risks to a minimum.
The last item on our list is – staying informed. Reading a lot about genital herpes will help you understand your disease, and learn how to minimize the risk of transmission. More importantly, you will become more confident and be ready to answer any questions your partner has after you come out and tell them you have genital herpes.
There you have it – 7 facts that will help you start dating even after being diagnosed with herpes. Hopefully, this information helps you and gives you the courage to go out there and find the love of your life. As you can see, it’s possible even with an STD.